By: Ivan Ćaleta, MA in Social Work, Centre for Missing and Exploited Children
Life in the 21st century provides us with significant advantages compared to our ancestors, and many challenges they faced are no longer part of modern everyday life. However, with these great benefits come new kinds of problems—issues that were virtually unheard of 20 years ago.
One such problem is grooming, the term used to describe the process often preceding the sexual abuse of children. In Croatian, grooming is translated as “recruitment” or “luring” (Đapić et al., 2021; Škrtić, 2013; Mehmedi, 2019). It refers to a process where a potential abuser befriends a child and gains their trust to involve them in abusive (often sexual) activities (Gillespie, 2004). Unfortunately, modern technology is frequently misused, giving rise to a new dimension of grooming, where virtual environments provide offenders with easier access to victims and allow them to maintain a high degree of anonymity at the same time (Vejmelka & Jurinić, 2020).
Abusers are skilled at achieving their objectives and often befriend children by feigning shared interests or creating fake profiles and photos to appear the same age as the child. However, not all groomers hide their age or gender. Some pose as figures children admire or aspire to emulate, such as sports coaches, celebrities, or influencers. Others simply exploit age differences to establish a mentor-student relationship with their victims.
Tips for Addressing Grooming:
- Discuss the Difference Between Online and Offline Friends – Emphasize that no matter how kind or approachable online friends may seem—or how long the child has been in contact with them—they are still strangers.
- Identify Red Flags – Watch for behaviours like suggesting offline meetings, asking for personal information, requesting photos or videos, or urging the child to keep secrets.
- Learn How to Block and Report Users – Social media platforms, apps, games, and other online services often have options to block or report problematic users.
- Make Sure Your Child Knows You Are There – Ensure that your child knows they can come to you without fear of overreaction. Fear of a parent’s response can prevent children from sharing sensitive or troubling experiences.
- Know Where to Seek Additional Support – Websites for the Centre for Missing and Exploited Children and the Safer Internet Centre offer essential contacts and information for dealing with potentially dangerous situations.
Works Cited:
Gillespie, A. A. (2004). Tackling Grooming. The Police Journal, 77(3), 239–255.
Vejmelka, L., & Jurinić, J. (2020).Terminologija i konceptualizacija seksualnog iskorištavanja djece na internetu. Kriminologija & socijalna integracija: časopis za kriminologiju, penologiju i poremećaje u ponašanju,, 28(1), 95–114.
Roje Đapić, M., Buljan Flander, G., & Galić, R. (2021). Seksualno zlostavljanje djece: Teorijsko-empirijski pregled i sustavna prevencija u Hrvatskoj. Socijalne teme, 1(8), 19–45.